


No Regrets

by metonomia



Category: Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-17
Updated: 2011-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:38:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metonomia/pseuds/metonomia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Slightly A/U. Susan knows how to live in one world but remember another, and she has no regrets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Regrets

**Author's Note:**

> For the Narnia Exchange 2010. Thanks to LaRM for the beta!

“I like this not,” Susan murmured to her sister as their ship eased into the harbor, a pleasant smile fixed upon both of their faces. The docks were crowded with the landing party they had anticipated, but its members were unsettling, to say the least, and the Gentle Queen did not care to be disquieted.

“Our ambassadors all indicated that Galma was pleased to receive us,” Lucy reminded her, but Susan could hear the frown in her voice.

“I think that perhaps our ambassadors have been deceived,” Susan said, and knew Lucy would catch the implication that they and their brothers had also been played for fools, children made an empty promise by adults who knew more of the world.

“I see no women save the Duchess and her retinue,” Lucy said, “and if any of those noblemen are not also capable soldiers, the crowd is surprisingly well-armed for commonfolk. They will overpower us easily if that is what they mean to do.”

“Your Majesties,” their captain bowed as he joined them at the rail. “Would you have us turn back?”

“Are we fast enough to outrun their ships?” Susan countered. “And in any case, no, we will not be fleeing. This is no true welcoming party, but neither is it an execution squad, and I would regret turning away from this opportunity. We will see what they wish of us.”

 

+

“My ladies Susan, Lucy,” the duke said, bowing slightly over their hands. His wife curtsied to them, not an inch more than she would to anyone of her own status. So they were not recognized as queens here, and Galma perhaps did not appreciate their invitation to Narnian citizenship as much as Susan and her siblings had assumed.

“My lord,” Susan replied, matching his insolence inch for inch. Galma may have held out on them, but she would not be unhinged by their lack of respect. To accept their assumption of power now would be to lose any chance at gaining the upper hand in the negotiations to follow. She felt Lucy’s foot nudging hers beneath their gowns, a question and a warning, and one which she promptly ignored.

“We and our royal sister are honored to be so welcomed,” she continued. “It is a great wish of Narnia that we be reunited with our cousin Galma in the friendship and mutual benefit of the past.”

In retrospect, it was not the best diplomatic choice Susan had ever made.

 

+

“It could be worse,” Lucy said that night as they sat awake in the single room set aside for the two of them. Susan glared at her, failure gnawing at her stomach.

“Susan, we all thought they recognized our authority. It’s not your fault that they didn’t respond to an assertion of it.”

“I looked ridiculous,” Susan sighed. “I forgot that we aren’t really in Narnia, that I didn’t have Peter and Edmund and an entire army behind my words.” Lucy patted her arm and stretched tired limbs, her face drawn and tired from the day of standing and talking and hopes sinking. Susan doubted that she looked any better than her sister, but she simply did not care. Looking well could not help when they had so offended Galma by turning up as the conquering heroes.

“I think,” Lucy began, her voice quiet, “that we assumed they would be easier to deal with after we’ve spent the past few years learning about governing the Narnians. But we didn’t realize that simply because they are humans doesn’t mean we know them or their culture.” Susan hummed in agreement.

“Lucy,” she said after a moment of silence, “how would you feel about a bit of an extended holiday?”

 

+

Their crew was gone by the next afternoon, the queens having worn their loyal subjects down to only a pair of guards and one lady.

“Your Grace,” Susan said from her curtsy, “I apologize for my lack of manners yesterday. My arrogance was ill-befitting a woman who would call herself Queen of any land, and a great insult to the hospitality of your people.”

“I am sorry, too,” Lucy said from beside her, ever more direct than Susan. “We would like to make it up to you, and to be friends.”

The Duke’s expression was guarded and a bit confused, and Susan wondered if he thought this polarity was the usual mode of Narnian politics. Very well; if her mistake had given them any sort of edge, she would gladly accept it.

“If Your Grace’s invitation yet stands, my sister and I would be pleased to have the opportunity to remain here for a time, to learn of your ways and to continue the negotiations between Narnia and Galma on a more equal and thoughtful plane.” A trade relationship with Narnia had to be important to him, she reminded herself slightly desperately. Politics could lie but hard economics could not - Narnia had food, timber and other commodities that Galma needed, and she would give it to them more cheaply than they could find anywhere else. Surely one foolish girl’s impolite greeting would not outweigh an entire land’s needs.

“You are welcome in our land, Susan of Narnia,” the Duke finally acquiesced, and Susan could only hope that her relief was not too apparent.

 

+

“How was your day?” Susan asked as Lucy entered their room nearly a month later. Lucy waved tiredly at her and flopped into a chair, toeing off the dirty boots she wore.

“It was good,” she admitted. “I was helping Nalene and her brothers prepare for the harvest festival and they told me more stories about Aslan that we don’t have. Do you know, they don’t actually believe he speaks? They think that those are just tales. And!” She sat upright, eyes sparkling in a mix of indignation and interest. “They say that he can appear in many different forms! He is only the Lion in summer and fall, and they say that if he comes in spring he is a sheep, and if in winter a stag. Imagine!”

“Perhaps he does, for them,” Susan said, and Lucy nodded.

“I think I should like to see our Lion as a lamb, just once,” she sighed.

“We can come back to Galma next spring with the official delegation,” Susan reminded her. “Maybe Aslan will meet you here then.”

“Oh, Susan, I cannot wait to be home. Not speaking of Narnia all day, trying to forget our stories and customs has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done!”

“It has,” Susan agreed, picking up her pen to resume a letter to Edmund and Peter. “But we’ve had each other to remember it with and by, and it’s only temporary, after all. Even if we had to stay here forever acting as Galmans, we’d still know our Narnia and our Aslan. I don’t regret a moment of the time we’ve spent here.”

 

+

“Susan!” Lucy yelled up the stairs, and Susan dashed down, stockings half-on and hair undone, to where her siblings were grouped by the open door, greeting Eustace and Jill Pole.

“Hello, goodbye,” she passed out hugs and kissed cheeks, pressing sandwiches into Edmund’s hands.

“I know you’re all terribly excited,” she said, “but I want all of you to eat something before you get on that train. There are extras for Jill and Eustace to take with, just in case.”

“You’re sure you won’t come?” Peter asked, and Susan shook her head.

“Liza’s party is the biggest of the year, and I can’t miss it or she’d be so disappointed. Besides, I haven’t been out with the girls in a while and they’re beginning to wonder what’s wrong with me. I’ll catch you up tomorrow and you’ll just have to fill me in then - hopefully I’ll be there in time to see you two off,” she directed the last at Eustace and Jill.

“Have fun,” Lucy told her. “Tell Liza ‘happy birthday’ from me.”

“Don’t let any strange men take you home,” Edmund smirked at her and she hit him softly.

“Only familiar ones, then, I promise!” Laughing, she hugged each of them once more and waved them out the door before running back to her room. Eustace and Jill possibly getting back to Narnia was wonderful, and she was as excited as any of the Friends, but Susan lived in England, and she did not regret it one bit.


End file.
